My Friendly Ghosts

My students: the ghosts of my former life.

I adore these ghosts, but I have to admit they take my breath away.

While I was on strike I got an email... "Was that you on the picket line? Why did you leave teaching? What are you doing at the University? Do you want to know about my life?" A former student doing amazing things.

Yesterday, I met another former student for lunch. When we talked about her graduating in a year and a half- I was speechless. This girl that I met when she was a tiny sophomore in high school, and watched grow to graduate from high school, is now a junior in college. I felt briefly as a parent would-"they grow up so fast!" And as I told her yesterday- she surprises me by how grown up she is- beautiful and intelligent, I wanted to hug her.

While A and I were at lunch, we saw another of my former students who stopped by to talk. She confidently told me about her triple major and how "I am much better student now", now a senior in college. Still the same, but a little more mature.

As we were finishing up, A finally said, "I have to tell you something sad... Do you remember ____? He and I dated briefly and he was in your class the year before me...He killed himself." I really couldn't breathe.

All I can picture is a blond boy that was so sweet and smiled all the time. I find myself wanting to channel him...you had so much life in front of you, you worked so hard in my class, and I loved talking to you... I am know I am not alone in that. It is hard to hear that you lost someone you hadn't really known recently, but that maybe you should have. His ghost has followed me around today in my mind.

It made me realize how much I don't want to lose those amazing ghosts that appear everywhere, their lives continue to enrich my own, even if I get a little spooked once in a while.