Leaving it behind...
Sometimes life has a way of reminding you that you have made some of the right turns along the way. I like that. It is a reminder that even though it may not always feel like it that you have your head on straight, you still have managed to steer (mostly) clear of stupid people and situations.
Yesterday at our last indoor winter frisbee game of the season there were several reminders of this. There are always two teams out of about 25 that I really don't like playing and we were playing one of them, and playing right next to the other one last night.
One team has my ex-boy friend, SL on it. I don't think I would mind this so much if he wasn't such a spaz about it. But every year and every season that we play his team he is mysteriously gone for that game. When we happen to run into each other during other points in the season, he either acts super weird or has obviously put a lot of thought into when exactly he will approach me and what he will say. As far as I am concerned: let it go, buddy. I was so over you approximately three minutes after we broke up. All that you indicate to me is that it is still all sadly a big drama for you.
The other team is the one I used to play on. I had met many of the members of this team when I first moved to the area and had started playing pick up. They asked me to play on their team that first fall. At first it was fun, my friend J and her husband were on the team and it was generally a funny group of people. After I had played on their team for a while I realized a couple of things, though- most of them were grad students and never really had a real job. It was like they were trying to put off real life, which would make sense since most of them seemed to be most interested in acting like they were in high school. I got a little sick of all the gossiping and trash talking about other people. I also out grew out them on the frisbee field. I had started playing with them when I wasn't very good. I think they liked this, but as soon as I started getting more experienced, I realized that this was threatening to them. They didn't want to be good, nor did they really want to play any differently than they always had. I was glad to join Jff's team when we started dating seriously.
So last night, while we were playing I watched two things: first, SL, on the field next to us started a shoving, pushing, and yelling match with a player about half of his size. He had to be restrained and as he was walking off the field I heard him yell, 'if I have to leave, he has to, too!" Check, check.
I was also watching our team beat the PANTS off my old team. I started to feel badly, but only until I realized that they were losing because they were still doing the same things they were doing when I played with them. I knew exactly when to poach and when to cut for the throw because it was clear they couldn't keep up or didn't know what to do. Meanwhile on the sidelines they were of course gossiping and trash talking about everything and anything, except the game. I scored three times last night and had to remind myself that it felt good to play my best and not apologize for it.
As were were leaving last night, I thought about all the other times I had left the fields, and I was relieved to be where I wanted to be. It is nice to look back sometimes with the clarity that time brings and to not wish for a second I could trade places. I was just so glad to be leaving with my husband and to be playing on a team that I would miss until we start playing together again in the fall. Amen for a lack of drama.
Yesterday at our last indoor winter frisbee game of the season there were several reminders of this. There are always two teams out of about 25 that I really don't like playing and we were playing one of them, and playing right next to the other one last night.
One team has my ex-boy friend, SL on it. I don't think I would mind this so much if he wasn't such a spaz about it. But every year and every season that we play his team he is mysteriously gone for that game. When we happen to run into each other during other points in the season, he either acts super weird or has obviously put a lot of thought into when exactly he will approach me and what he will say. As far as I am concerned: let it go, buddy. I was so over you approximately three minutes after we broke up. All that you indicate to me is that it is still all sadly a big drama for you.
The other team is the one I used to play on. I had met many of the members of this team when I first moved to the area and had started playing pick up. They asked me to play on their team that first fall. At first it was fun, my friend J and her husband were on the team and it was generally a funny group of people. After I had played on their team for a while I realized a couple of things, though- most of them were grad students and never really had a real job. It was like they were trying to put off real life, which would make sense since most of them seemed to be most interested in acting like they were in high school. I got a little sick of all the gossiping and trash talking about other people. I also out grew out them on the frisbee field. I had started playing with them when I wasn't very good. I think they liked this, but as soon as I started getting more experienced, I realized that this was threatening to them. They didn't want to be good, nor did they really want to play any differently than they always had. I was glad to join Jff's team when we started dating seriously.
So last night, while we were playing I watched two things: first, SL, on the field next to us started a shoving, pushing, and yelling match with a player about half of his size. He had to be restrained and as he was walking off the field I heard him yell, 'if I have to leave, he has to, too!" Check, check.
I was also watching our team beat the PANTS off my old team. I started to feel badly, but only until I realized that they were losing because they were still doing the same things they were doing when I played with them. I knew exactly when to poach and when to cut for the throw because it was clear they couldn't keep up or didn't know what to do. Meanwhile on the sidelines they were of course gossiping and trash talking about everything and anything, except the game. I scored three times last night and had to remind myself that it felt good to play my best and not apologize for it.
As were were leaving last night, I thought about all the other times I had left the fields, and I was relieved to be where I wanted to be. It is nice to look back sometimes with the clarity that time brings and to not wish for a second I could trade places. I was just so glad to be leaving with my husband and to be playing on a team that I would miss until we start playing together again in the fall. Amen for a lack of drama.
posted by KLOU | 8:49 AM
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