Valuable Adventure

A couple that I know are finishing off their basement. Baby is on the way and their house is going to be for family soon and not just couple. In order to finish the construction before baby T's arrival, they hired a contractor to do the work for them. I was visiting this weekend, consulting on some decorating ideas, and it occurred to me how different their experience right now is from ours.

We have been redoing our stone-age kitchen. While planning a wedding, it has been our top priority to save funds. So we have been doing much of the work ourselves. At times it is frustrating because in an old house nothing is standard, everything takes eighty five years to do, and it tough to do a good job while also choosing inexpensive updates. I have to keep reminding myself that this is not our family house, that there will be other kitchens in my future. For a short while this weekend, I felt like I wanted someone who knew what they were doing to be doing all the work for us. Wouldn't it be nice if something were just being done without all the time, energy, and worry?

Tonight, I had a change of heart. What have I been thinking? I like working on the house- all its unique features included. There are many reasons why. First, I am learning so much! Last night I learned how to use a miter saw (funner than fun! even though that is not a word), I also attached some baseboard in the kitchen with a pneumatic finishing nail gun that was attached to a compressor (scary how dangerous, but exciting to be able to do something so fast!). I now know how to install a sink and counter top, to caulk, and to refinish cabinets. Second, the pride that I feel when I see what OUR hard work is doing is immeasurable. It gives more soul to the house we live in. Finally, it has been marvelous doing all of this with Jff. It is fun to see what we are each good at when it comes to this construction stuff and to know that we could do this again in the future . (Jff is really good at this and, no surprise here, is really resourceful.)

So, one day I may contract, but for now I am proud of what my hands can do. It has been the most valuable type of adventure, all within my own home.

Note to self: use latex gloves

This afternoon I had a surreal experience in my classroom(this one's for you My Capacity). I realized that my job is not like other people's. I think, because I have always been in school, literally, I forget what a REAL work environment is like. This is what brought it on:

whiny female student (rolling hair around finger) : "Ms. Kloumr...."
"yes?" (distracted, trying to talk to 8 other students at the same time.)
Becky: "Joe and I are a little worried about the grade that we will get on our battle story project."
"Why is that?" (still not totally tuned in...)
Becky: "Well, we didn't remember to do all of the information bullets on the data sheet... and (more hair rolling) ...and well, also, James just got blood all over it."
"hmmm..." (silence, funny look on my face, but now focused on Becky )"Well, at least it will look authentic" (and me thinking, 'and I now I know to wear latex gloves while grading American History projects')
Becky:"Yeah, just wanted to tell you." (flicks hair off face)
"Thanks" ('for reminding me why I am grossed when I let you guys use my writing utensils')

Would I have conversations about people's bodily fluids being on a document I needed to process at any other job? For some reason, I suspect no.

Role "models"

I have been a teacher or teacher-in-training for about seven or eight years. In that time, I have met a lot of teachers. Eventually, you start to develop a teacher-catalogue of sorts in your mind. This helps you rapidly identify your colleagues. You always have the "I'd rather be..." person who clearly has their mind in another place entirely. They leave at 3:02 on the dot. You have the "can I be someone's mother?" who clearly finds meaning in being constantly needed. You also have the "old school is the only school" member of the staff who still leaves for a smoke break mid-morning. But in large part, the teachers are good people who are good for students in some way...

So, into the second semester in my new digs, I have identified most everyone's character. Check, check. There are all the traditional roles, you would expect, some funny, some endearing, and some pretty annoying. But they allow school to function as it always does. There is, however, a new archetype I have never had the, well... excruciating horror, of seeing in action before.

The comment of, "the older I get, the younger I want to appear" is something this late-twenties teacher actually said to the newspaper in our metro area when they interviewed her for the "style" section.(She was featured because of her stylish attire at school, a.k.a. Louis Vitton bags, Seven jeans, etc.). Her genre, I have decided, is "teaching high school in order to still BE in high school".

At lunch, she commands the attention of all of the other teachers around her and proceeds to spend the entire lunch period gossiping about this student and that family. And wouldn't you know it, she is the advisor for cheerleading, too! One of my students was just lamenting to me that she wished she had been a captain for the cheer squad because then Mrs. High School would have given her a Coach wristlet purse as a gift, too. What?

So at this point, you are probably thinking... "None of that is so bad, is Kloumr just jealous?" No, and it gets worse. Recently, she decided it would great to put together a "staff cheer squad" to perform at the winter sports pep fest. Good idea- I am all for doing funny things to keep kids interested. Unfortunately, though, for her it was serious. She did jumps, she tumbled, she lived high school for a few minutes during the assembly. That same day I made the poor decision of joining a group of the teachers for lunch. She came in gushing, "Oh God, I was having so much fun, I didn't want it to end." She continued blathering throughout lunch with, "that was soooo great" and "none of my girls have ever seen me do a jump before, they were super impressed" and "that is the highlight of my year so far, for sure".

I could go on, but it is probably unnecessary. I am currently trying to embody the quote that was scrawled on the bulletin board of my freshman geography lecture hall in college, "The opposite of love is not hate. It is indifference." This is hard, and I am currently losing the battle. I think it is because Mrs. High School's ethos is so opposite of mine, I struggle with her as a high school teacher. Here's why: we are role models for our students, no matter who we are. (Now, I am not claiming that I am a super duper role model all the time. I am not particularly impressive when I do things like crash into and fall over the recycling bin mid-sentence, while teaching.) But I do believe in, and try to, illustrate to the students personal responsibility, humility, and concern for others.

Do we really need teachers who encourage students to continue thinking that what goes on in high school is the be all end all of life, that nothing will ever be so great, that popularity and brand names are most important and vital to your position in life? I vote no.

Snow day= Fun day

Or at least that is what I would have been saying today if I wasn't trying to think of what to do with the 8 kids that made it to school in my 1st hour class while the rest of the metro area was congratulating themselves on having a snow (fun) day.

I was full of nasty words for my school district, especially after I spent an hour driving the 8 miles from my home to get 1 mile from school and have a cop re-route me back in the direction of home so that he could solve the congestion problem on the bridge. I watched him let the school buses full of my students go forth, while he forced me back on to the grid-locked freeway going east. When I rolled down my window to tell him I was a teacher of the kids in the bus he just let by, he yelled at me, "I don't care who the hell you are- get going". Once going east I was tempted to keep driving home, but instead perservered and made it to school only to get to sub for many other teachers that didn't make it in.

No Snow Day= %#&%$@ Day.

The Sport I Don't Like

Last night was the last indoor frisbee game of the season, and while we were on our way there, I was glad. Don't get me wrong, I love playing frisbee and I love playing frisbee in the winter. But last night we had a great dinner with good friends and I was more interested in having drinks on the H's couch than I was with "making good cuts" (especially with all that food in my stomach).

But like every night at frisbee, after about two minutes, I was totally into the game and so glad that I was there. So,I realized as I was standing on the side lines, sweaty and thirsty at 10 o'clock on a Friday night, that I really love sports. Why else would I spend my Friday nights at the mercy of the frisbee schedule, especially when we played often this season at 11 pm? I love running around, I love the competitive spirit, I love just being around people that like sports the same way I do.

At dinner, good friend said to me, "is there a sport you don't like?", and I had to think about it. There are sports I am not good at, (swimming, hockey, soccer) and there are sports I don't like watching on TV (soccer, football) but otherwise I couldn't really think of a sport I really don't like (except maybe wrestling with my bro, A- I always lose). For the first time ever, while I was watching my team play frisbee, I said to myself, (in my head of course), "I love sports." I don't think I had ever thought about it so simply and directly before. It was nice.

This used to work...

Last night around this time, I was sitting at my local VFW club. No, I wasn't shopping for a great place for my wedding reception or eating a fund-raising spaghetti dinner. I was sitting in the back row at my precinct caucus. Ahhh.
Democracy in action.. While I took in the wood paneling and the shag carpet-covered poles, I was making snotty comments under my breath to Jff about the proceedings. I was appalled. The precinct captain who I had voted for two years earlier at another precinct meeting was butchering the meeting (at the time I was proud to have voted for a diamond in the rough- 40 year old man in tight sweat pants and t-shirt- I was convinced that he would do a great job-not so much).

In quite possibly the same sweat pants, our captain stood in the front of the room and did not have a clue about what should be happening. While reading directly from his sheet of instructions (coughing at every other word) he successfully confused 95% of the participants about who was a delegate for what, where, and when. The straw voting was worse. The resolutions part of the meeting is when Jff finally had to step in and set a few people, including sweat pants, straight. I was close to openly weeping, when Barb the 85 year old lady in the process of reading her resolution, which included reading through all of the pillars of Islam, droned on through several protestations of other participants. The following was flowing through my mind, "We are achieving nothing here, this is why people don't participate in politics in this country, this meeting is completely pointless, none of these people will ever attend another caucus, all because of Barb." And I am a government teacher! I should know better. When we finally crawled out the two hour meeting, I was thoroughly depressed. I was thinking "democracy used to work, what has happened?".

With a much clearer head this morning and my AP Government class looming, I reframed. These are my conclusions: First, we do students a disservice by teaching them the romaticized view of democracy in most classrooms-they should attend a caucus (some of mine did!). Democracy is not neat, quick, easy, nor always "fair". This is because, among other things, the framers were petrified of mob rule and the average citizen. Making democracy slow and tedious was a protection from tyrannical take overs or the common people actually ruling. Second, we do ourselves and everyone else a disservice in this country by not putting enough emphasis on educating young people about this system that we created and how they can participate in it. Until people actually understand the value of our system and how to use it, ironically until they are educated about it, most U.S. citizens will remained tuned out, because after all democracy today can seem too complicated, too cumbersome, and too slow to take part in and get anywhere- even sometimes to a U.S. government teacher.

My luck runneth over...

One of the luckiest moments in my life is the day I met my fiancee. We were randomly placed on the same frisbee team. That evening I showed up to the frisbee fields, early of course. I didn't know anyone and I was nervous about my frisbee abilities. I remember checking out the team (not even for dates) but for interesting people. I was feeling a little like it was going to be a pretty uninteresting team until the last member showed up. That was Jff, running up, late, of course (I love him for it). He had a huge smile on his face and greeted everyone with such endearing, wonderful enthusiasm. I was instantly, intensely glad he was there. Not because I was thinking of dating him, just because he was happy, kind, and fun. And fun to look at, I will admit.

As we are now planning our wedding, I easily get caught up into details that don't matter. I am thinking, "I wonder if the $20 veil I ordered off of eBay will look like a converted fish net", instead of, "I am so incredibly lucky to be marrying the most wonderful person I have ever known- it doesn't matter what my stupid veil looks like." So I count myself fortunate that I am often reminded WHY I am marrying Jff.

It is the total understanding without words that exists so often, it is the life decisions we contemplate and solve together, it is the dinners that we make for each other, it is the paper we read next to each other, it is his bare bones adoration for Leo, it is the fact that I came home really late from work tonight and he wasn't annoyed, just glad for me that I had gotten a chance to talk to a friend of mine there.

So, sappy or not, I have to say, my luck runneth over...