Funny Story

 My status on FB just now:

Trip to New Jersey: ______ Airport 9 am, boarded plane 3 times, sat on tarmack twice, deplaned 3 times, sat in the airport 2 miles from own house for most of the day, returned home at 5:30 pm with a canceled flight and luggage that made it to Newark. Total miles traveled yesterday: 4. Attempt #2 tonight- can't wait.

 I think it's a funny story, but only after the surealness of it all has dissipated. 

It got me thinking about the major problems this country has with long-distance travel. The airlines and the entire airport system in this country is a major mess on the edge of crashing and burning. (No pun intended.) And it is our best option from getting from point A to point B without driving. Yikes!

My work conference will be half over by the time I get "there". What a waste of time and money this all is.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Today. I have been dreading this trip since the beginning of July. We are headed out to the east coast for a work conference of mine. Husband and Baby B are coming along so that I didn't have to be without the baby for 5 days. I am relieved they will be with me, but I am also wondering how this is all going to work with them with me.

So, when I come back it will be back to work and back to reality!

Month 3

On Thursday Benji will be 3 months old. Although I feel like he has been a part of our life for a long time, I also feel like I can't believe that he is already that old. Wasn't it just yesterday that I gave birth?

Then again, as he is growing up, he is now much easier to "manage" (I have no better word for it). He has lost the fussiness of a new baby. He now interacts with us- smiling, making sounds, "playing" intentionally, and actively enjoying life.  He can hold his head up, look around, follow objects (and people) with his eyes, and hold things in his hands. Now, he only cries for specific reasons: he is tired, he is hungry, he is uncomfortable. His personality is clearly emerging now... A little shy around new people, fascinated by the world around him, constantly observing (so much so that he has a hard time "shutting off" when it is time to go to sleep), happy but serious, and loves to play and move.

As of late, I have watched him become more physical. He is a very big, strong baby and he loves to move. While playing on his tummy he moves his legs like he is trying to crawl and has rolled over on to his side already by pushing with his legs. He kicks very hard while sitting in various seats and if he is supported by us, will stand on his legs. When he spreads his arms straight out on either side of himself, he has a huge wingspan...

In terms of sleeping he is taking more consistent naps and is better about going down with less coaxing. At night he normally will sleep for 5-6 hour chunks, and he has had one 8 hour night (we are waiting for a repeat performance that hasn't happened yet). Up until now he hasn't been good at sleeping anywhere other than his swing at home, but is finally now able to sleep a little while we are on a walk or shopping.

If nothing else, he is a man with a schedule in mind and is nice and predictable. The challenge lately is deciding how much of that schedule to abide by- how much do I stick around the house because he wants to sleep, and how much do I ask him to try and sleep while we are on the move? I feel like that is slowly getting a bit easier to figure out... But traveling still gets him off and he is a far cry from what I would call a "flexible" baby.

Benji's feedings are finally spreading out and that makes life feel incredibly more sane than it was. Although he still pretty much refuses pacifiers, he does suck on his hand or blankets and can hold himself off just a bit before a feed. I no longer live in fear for when he would just start screaming out of no where to be fed and couldn't be brought down without eating (this proves to be challenging while you are in the middle of Target). The next phase will be getting him to reliably take bottles during the day (he will always take the bottle from Jff in the middle of the night). I will soon need to figure out where and how often to pump at work, just as he will need to be soothed by bottles at daycare. That part makes me sad, as much as I want to work, it just feels wrong for us to be separated when I have what he wants most. :-)

 So as we move past the three month mark, I am sure that life will continue to get easier. Even though Benji always continues to change and grow so that new tricks quickly become outdated, we have gotten to know him pretty well. We have spent almost a 'semester' studying him and now are feeling like seasoned pros (most of the time). The newest challenges appearing on our horizon will be traveling to the east coast with him next week (for work), day care, returning to work, and oh, the illustrious teething that seems to be right around the corner! Can't wait for more of our little person to emerge!

A Refocus of Sorts

The first thing I should say here is that before I had Benji, I was really afraid of this blog becoming a mommy blog. I was determined that I would not just write about Benji, but that I would rather continue on writing about the random things I always had.

Call me naive, but this is much harder than I had originally thought...

Why? Well, first of all, I usually blog about things that I think about and have some commentary on. Now, I THINK and reflect a lot about Benji and being a mom (this is part of what you sign up for when you give birth- your brain changes). I have a hard time not writing about my experience as a mom all the time now. Second, especially right now, I am just not out as much doing things that don't involve Benji. I am not back at work yet, I don't often go places without him, and more to the point, my life all of sudden has a bit of a different focus to it. It is no longer about what I want to do all the time, but rather what I NEED to do a lot of the time.

So, I hope that is a bit of an explanation for the fact that I will be writing a bit more about mom stuff. The funny thing about this explanation is that I don't really know who reads this blog other than the few who comment on it or who talk to me directly about it. I am assuming there are about three people who read. That is fine with me, in the end, I write it for myself and not for an audience, and that is ultimately why I feel like I can just let it evolve. My apologies to those who are uninterested, but let the fun begin.

A New Favorite

I found a new favorite dish the other night when we attended a summer BBQ for the organization that I am involved with. As a board member, I needed to be there but desperately did not want to go yet another place where we would have to introduce Benji eight thousand times, pacify him once he is sufficiently over-stimulated by all the new faces, and all the while maintain polite, coherent conversation with many people I do not know well.

One small bonus of the evening, aside from the fact that Benji provided a great reason not to stay long, was tasting a great cole slaw that a fellow board member had brought. It tasted very fresh, and after eating lots of different salads this summer, it was very new to me. Everyone raved about it,  and after a little bit of research, I found the recipe on epicurious.com:



Cabbage and Corn Slaw with Cilantro and Orange Dressing:

• 1/3 cup frozen orange juice concentrate, thawed
• 1/3 cup unseasoned rice vinegar
• 1/3 cup canola oil or vegetable oil
• 2 (8-ounce) bags coleslaw mix
• 4 ears of fresh corn, shucked, kernels cut from cob
• 2 medium carrots, peeled, coarsely grated
• 1 medium red bell pepper, stemmed, cored, cut into thin strips
• 6 medium green onions, thinly sliced
• 1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro

Whisk orange juice concentrate, rice vinegar, and canola oil in small bowl. Season with salt and pepper. DO AHEAD Dressing can be made 1 day ahead. Cover and refrigerate.

Combine slaw mix, corn kernels, carrots, red bell pepper strips, sliced green onions, and chopped cilantro in large bowl. Toss with enough dressing to coat. Season slaw to taste with salt and pepper. Let stand 15 minutes for flavors to blend. Toss again and serve.

Our 1,095th Day

Four years ago last week Jff and I walked up a mountain in the rain and he asked me if we could, sometime in the future, get all dressed up, take lots of pictures, and get legally bound to each other.... So three years ago today we got hitched. We had an amazing time and to be honest, the fun still hasn't stopped.


Since July 15th, 2006 we have had many adventures together. Jff graduated with his master's degree, under went a massive job hunt and in the fall of 2006 landed what would become his dream job. He is still at it. I began living a dream where in which I began my slow departure from the world of high school education, I taught part time while returning to grad school. We continued to travel, play outside, and do many sports together. We updated our kitchen, updated many other rooms in the house, built a deck, and started to remodel our basement. I quit teaching altogether and found a job in higher ed while finishing my master's degree. Jff began publishing his work papers left and right, with requests to speak and travel to different places to share his expertise. We traveled for three weeks in Europe visiting Denmark, Czech Republic, Germany, France, and Iceland. I was given an oral history project to run at work. I wrote my master's thesis. Jff and I found out that we were expecting our first child. I landed my dream job. Benji was born and is almost three months old.


All of these adventures have been scary, crazy, and amazing, but most of all a wonderful part of our life together. Every day I feel incredibly lucky to have met Jff when I did. And the best part of three years together? I get to see him every day. I get to watch him be an amazing father, grow professionally, and to do great projects at home. I get to be his playmate and his biggest fan. I get to disagree with him and I get to discuss the matters of the world with him. I get to ride next to him in the car, wake up next to him in the morning, and end my day with him every night. I get to cry with him and do a ton of a laughing with him. I get to raise a child with him.

I would be remiss in writing this whole blog post with out mentioning how both of us owe our continued happy and wonderful life to many of those around us. We are blessed with a terrific network of friends and relatives who every day enrich our lives as we enrich each others' lives. We have great friends to go on adventures with, to discuss matters of the day with, and make light of our ups and downs with. We have family who love us and share their lives with us in ways that make our life together better. Most of all? We are lucky we have people who will babysit for us when we go out for our anniversary! Happy day, Jff!

Project: Quiet Book Rehabilitation

Last September my Grandma Peterson passed away after a long struggle with COPD and debilitating demensia. Prior to being sick my Grandma had been a powerhouse all her life. She golfed a mean game, could talk to anyone about anything, loved the Cubs, cooked, sewed up a storm, and could organize stuff and people better than anyone I know.

Now that she is gone, reminders of her are everywhere for me. Everyday I see the samplers that she crossed stitched for my birth and for my marriage to Jff. I love the Christmas decorations she both made and gave me every year. I treasure so many other little things that she left behind for me. Thinking of her before her illnesses changed her makes me incredibly happy.

The one thing that I can't help but miss is that I wish she would have lived long enough to have met Benji. She had a such a way with babies and just was always brimming with so much love. I have been thinking a lot about my childhood with her and wishing for the same sort of person in my son's life. Because of this it has prompted me to track down some of the things that she made for me when I was a young girl.

One of the most important things in my memory was the "Quiet Book" Grandma made me. Since I don't think anyone will make one for Benjamin, I would love for him to be able to enjoy it (and take part in one of Grandma's legacies) as well.

This artifact was well loved and unfortunately was hidden in a box in my parents basement for a long time. My mom recently dug it out for me, and I realize that it needs a little TLC before it can be a favorite toddler toy of Benji's. Here is my plan:

Page 1 needs a new purple felt triangle with a small velcro piece sewed on the back. Page 2, the mitten could use some new eyes since the old marks faded when I washed it.

Page 4 needs a stain removed and all of the ladybug's black dots re-attached.

Page 5 and 6 are in good shape.

Page 7 needs a new (two layer) felt balloon with a snap sewn into it. On page 8 the football laces need to be re-washed and bleached to be white again.

Page 9 and 10 need some new beads, a replacement string of four beads, and some strings re-attached.

Then it will be as good as new! Hopefully, then it will endure many more years of love from Benji and any future kids.

Quiz: How do you know you have hit rock bottom?

I know that I really shouldn't be sitting on my computer on the Fourth of July, let alone posting on my blog (twice), but I have to say this somewhere:

Sometimes facebook makes me sad. It makes me sad when the same person takes a thousand and five Facebook quizzes a day. No, I am not talking about the occasional interest in "What Seinfeld character you would be?"... or "What color would you be?" (I admit I guilty of taking this one... for some unknown reason) I am, in fact, talking about the constant stream of results from various quizzes that are then relayed in my status updates. It tells me that the person in question either a) has WAY too much time on their hands, b) maybe having an identity crisis, c) didn't get enough quizzes in middle school in their Seventeen Magazine or d) have nothing more inspiring in their life to engage in rather than taking Facebook quizzes constantly.

Option e) "all of the above" leaves me tremendously distressed.

Today I believe I witnessed an Option E, or a hitting of rock bottom of sorts: one of my "friends" on facebook, a compulsive quiz-taker, took the quiz "What would I be if I were a 4th of July Firework?". 
Scary, wrong, disturbing, and most of all, uninteresting.

Peach White Wine Sangria, Please

 If I could drink right now,  this would be my drink of choice: Peach-White Wine Sangria*. Perfect for using a lot of garden basil and for delighting in the summer season.

*Thanks to notmartha.com for highlighting the recipe.

A message in my cereal bowl

This morning as I was putting fruit on my cereal, I had a thought that I have often:

There are a zillion and five paint/dye colors out there. However, it still seems like there is no true way to capture the colors that are created in the wild. Those colors are so deep, so vibrant, so fluid that it seems there is no way to really replicate them with synthetic mediums.


Examples?
The sunset I saw a few nights ago as I drove home through the River Valley. In parts of the sky there was barely any color and in other parts it was the deepest pink. I know that millions of paintings have tried to replicate this, but I don't think they ever quite succeed.

The cattails that we walked through last night. Husband, baby B and I went for a walk through a wet land nature preserve and in the evening light the greens were so incredibly vibrant in contrast with the beautiful dark water, it was breath taking. There is no comparison to the green of a living thing.

My blueberries this morning were that deep, deep blue with a bit of lighter color over the top. Hardly words to describe, but a color that makes you feel that it is fitting that you EAT blueberries, as a way to experience them to the fullest.

Fall leaves, especially the color of leaves from Maple trees. Last fall, on the morning of LLC's wedding, as I drove through the tree-lined streets on the way to the church, my breath was taken away as the sun came through many of these bright red leaves. I don't think I will ever forget that feeling or that picture in my mind.

It strikes me as I write this that maybe that is why winter is so hard for me (and many others)... I miss the vibrant colors and textures of the world while it is covered in white flatness that is either too dark or too bright. So I guess a reminder, in the middle of the summer, to enjoy the existence of color today, even if it is just in your bowl of cereal.

Attempting a Blog Post...

This post was written over two weeks ago and at first I wasn't going to post it since it remained unfinished, and frankly didn't have much to say, but in hopes of at least getting something posted to my blog, here it is:

Tonight I am on my own with the monkey man (as husband calls Benji). Husband is giving a talk at an evening event for work. Benji is currently sleeping in the swing which is giving me a short break. It is times like these that I have tremendous amount of respect for single mothers or stay at home moms whose husbands travel. It is hard to be on all day AND all night.

So just some random thoughts to give me a break from baby world for a few minutes:

Neighborhood watch, part two: today, the house across the street is getting re-roofed. The workers started early this morning and are still going. It has been fun to watch what is going on over there. I honestly don't know why I am so fascinated with watching projects in the neighborhood or why I think I need to write about it... I think I just like watching things get done, funny how it is a productive FEELING even if I am not personally accomplishing anything.

A woman who is both a personal friend and a professional mentor came over this afternoon to visit Benji and also to update me on some of the work that we do together. It was fun to see her, she is really a wonderful person. The only downside is that the visit reminded me of all of the changes that will be taking place this fall at the institution where I work. This fall will be interesting as the center where I am based out of will change. So currently, I am virtually boss-less and my program is home-less in a sense. There is a lot of work to be done when I return to work in the middle of August, all with shifting boundaries and responsibilities, and with a lot of shifts happening at home due to daycare, etc. It feels a bit overwhelming and for now I would rather have my head in the sand of summer.

For Father's day we went to a Twins game with my dad, step-mom, and brother. Benji was also in attendance. It was a great game- we had excellent seats down near the field behind left field. However, it was the first time that I actually was hoping for no homeruns because the crowd would get so crazy loud that it would scare Benji. There were four home runs of course.

Abrupt end-back to Benji duty.